I was on meds for a while, and it really made life drag. Unfortunately, it didn't just make it drag: it made more succeptible to whatever is going on. It made me sad to see that people whom are younger than me have achieved more than I could, even in terms of the friendship of the beautiful girl I fell for. 24 years, three countries, two languages, and what can I do with that? I can barely pay my bills.
I feel a hole in my chest. It's like if all of my insides had been pulled out and I had been stuffed with a handful of dry leaves. When I move, I feel the leaves making noise, and the air in my chest... this feeling of emptyness that seems like only her company would fill up.
I need to find my space in life. If life was clearer... I mean, if there was a sign where it said "Mau, stay here, this is the empty spot that you should be in". It would make life more understandable for a person with a dull understanding of people like me.
I feel inadequate. When she feels unhappy, I feel useless.
I drew on my arm because I just couldn't get you off my mind. Because I only seem able to communicate effectively what I feel for you in terms of art.
What I want is a meaninful message with three words in it.
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