Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Long tuesday

According to my doctor, my red blood cells are small and cute. But he says it shouldn't interfere with life because they aren't that small.
So I think I can feel a lot better if I do things differently.
I feel slightly annoyed. I just wish I could be different. But it's hard. Me is all I know how to be. And I want to get somewhere as me. I don't want to lose myself.
Which I already have done, to be honest.
I can't be perfect. And I have to accept that.
Today I got a taste of my old self during stats class: Baileys, in the wrong place, at the wrong time. That made me realize that I'm not who I was before. I don't know what I've become. I don't hang out with people, I have no fun, and I hate it. I got to be my old self again.
However, I can't forget about the good traits I've picked up along the way. I got to keep what's useful.
Ah, life, I wish you weren't so complicated. It's like life is a tightly balanced equation with lots of variables in which changing anything can cause the whole thing to fall apart.
Gotta simplify it.
Smirnoff Ice, please.

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